In approaching this assignment, I was drawn to the emotional complexity of Carmen Maria Machado’s Eight Bites. I focused on how societal pressures and internalized body standards affect the relationship between the narrator and her daughter. As someone who has experienced similar struggles with body image, I used this essay to reflect critically on how those themes can be passed down across generations. For the final portfolio version, I revised the structure of the essay to make my argument more focused. I ensured that each paragraph addressed a central idea and connected it clearly to the text. I also revised sentence clarity, strengthened transitions, and refined the personal examples I included so they supported the overall analysis instead of distracting from it.

Motherhood in Eight Bites essay

  Motherhood is often seen as a selfless act, a role where a woman gives all of what she has to offer to her child. But what happens when a mother is unable to accept herself? In Eight Bites, “Her body and other parties” Carmen Maria Machado explores the deep insecurities women carry about their bodies and how those insecurities don’t just affect them but also their children.  Raising a child is not just you my child but alot of things come in the way.The protagonist’s decision to undergo weight loss surgery is driven by her own feelings. It created a  distance between her and her daughter. Machado critiques the expectations placed on women, showing how self-rejection can be inherited and how motherhood is intertwined with the struggle for self-acceptance.

One of the things I want to discuss is how in eight bites the narrator and her daughter get affected. Her daughter, who sees things differently, refuses to buy into the idea that thinness equals happiness, creating a quiet but painful distance between them. I can’t imagine being a part of my mother. But I have to put myself in her daugther shoes. If my mother is doing things I don’t like I will talk to her. The daughter watches her mother chase an impossible standard, knowing she’ll never get her back in the same way. Once you do something to your body it is not the same. Once people are used to seeing you in a way they won’t see you the same if you change. The narrator is so caught up in trying to become the person she thinks she’s supposed to be that she doesn’t see how it affects her daughter. What I find messed up is that she truly believes being thin will make her happy because that’s what she’s always been told. Her sisters all had the surgery and pushed her to do the same. The narrator never thought of what her daughter may think. This speaks to something bigger the way mothers, even with the best intentions, can unintentionally pass down harmful ideas about self-worth. The narrator probably thought if people want me skinny, maybe my daughter wants me to be skinny, she probably wants me to be “pretty”. On the book her daughter said mom why cant you just be happy with yourself. 

The unspoken tension with the narrator and her daughter reflects a big theme in Eight Bites, the burden of societal expectations. Mothers are often seen as role models and they are shaped by the pressures around them. Moms think they should be perfect and they should make no mistakes. The narrator does not question the expectations placed upon her, she simply follows them, believing that happiness is something she must physically attain rather than something internal. Her sisters, who have all undergone the same surgery, reinforce this idea that if my sister really loved me why would she make me do these things? I should find happiness in myself rather than others. This made it seem like an inevitable step rather than a personal choice. I believe if you think it makes you happy do it but doing something because of others doesn’t work that way. I could relate to this. I am hispanic and growing up I have always had extra weight and I remeber that my own family would say she is 10 she should be on a diet or it better to stop it now then later. I grew up with a lot of insecurity still today but it’s not like I was still a child now. I don’t care what others think. I have learned to love my body a bit more, but there are moments were I feel insecure and start thinking of what people think of me. Moments were I think maybe I should get weight loss surgey or get a lipo but then I think is this for me or for others? The fact that the narrator’s daughter does not share these beliefs is significant because it highlights that younger women are beginning to challenge the harmful beauty standards that older generations accepted as fact. This creates an emotional distance between them. The narrator is so consumed by her own self-image that she cannot see how her choices affect her daughter. She assumes that her surgery is for the best, never realizing that in trying to erase the parts of herself she dislikes, she is also erasing something her daughter still values. 

Something we should talk about is that naterer had a hard time growing up. It is something that her own mother made her do since she was young to her and her sisters.  The idea of eating only eight bites comes directly from the narrator’s mother, these “beauty standards” are across generations something it had to be stopped to not continue that same path. The narrator and her sisters was taught that eight bites were the “perfect” amount of food for a woman just enough. Who eats only eight bites and is full? This is where I say if she only ate 8 bights isn’t she supposed to be skinny? This rule passed down like a family tradition. Her mother’s influence lingers long after her death, shaping the narrator’s relationship with food, her body made her not like her own body.  She follows this rule unconsciously, believing that restriction and control are the paths to happiness. She ends up getting a surgery to permanently shrink her body, she is haunted by the parts of herself she has erased. This ghostly presence serves as a painful reminder that no matter how much she tries to conform to beauty standards, a sense of loss remains. You can’t change a broken glass after it falls. Once the glass falls it is impossible to glue it together. Her mother’s lesson about eating was supposed to bring her happiness but it didn’t. 
Eight Bites presents motherhood as a complex, often painful experience shaped by societal pressures and personal insecurities.